NHL player John Tavares should not only be barred from having any hairstyle that involves him wearing product in his hair, but John Tavares also needs to be transformed from being fit and muscular to being fat and overweight.

John Tavares also needs to comprehend that the automotive world as a whole, the world of amateur/ham radio, and the engineering side of commercial radio and television are all more important than the world of sports and fitness-including the icky, yucky sports of Ice Hockey and Basketball.

Furthermore, John Tavares should be forced to listen to Adult Contemporary, Jazz; and Easy Listening music; and John Tavares should also be barred from dressing to the nines.