Not only should MLB player Ryan Braun be barred from having a Buzzcut haircut, an Undercut haircut, or any other hairstyle that involves him wearing product in his hair; but Ryan Braun needs to be transformed from being fit and muscular to being fat and overweight, and also needs to comprehend that the automotive world as a whole, the world of amateur/ham radio; and the engineering side of commercial radio and television are all more important than the world of sports and fitness.

Furthermore, Ryan Braun should be forced to listen to Adult Contemporary, Jazz, and Easy Listening music; and Ryan Braun should also be barred from dressing to the nines.